The Portrait of a non-Artist as an Old Man


And now for something entirely different.

I can’t draw stick people. Mine are recognizable only to me. Most 4 year olds do a better job of drawing people. They put fingers and toes on theirs. I’m not there yet.

I also can’t sing. I have empirical proof of that. Once in a former life, I was a monk. There was a Gregorian Choir and mandatory auditions at our monastery. Before the auditions were novices were informed that the two poorest singers would become acolytes and would serve at the altar. I won the acolyte position going away. It wasn’t a contest – not even close.

I love art and have spent time in some of the world’s leading galleries; the Louvre, the Tate, the Guggenheim, the McMichael, etc.

I also love music. I even owned a 5 string banjo for a week or so before coming to grips with the fact that I really do not have any sense of rythmn. I gave it to a talented friend because I knew he loved it and would care for it.

I have been a member of the Arts Community for many years. I was even on the Board of Directors of our local very dynamic Quinte Arts Council.

I can write non-fiction. I have been a university newspaper editor, have written 30 or so books and even have an award-winning, best-seller in my credits. I am trying to do my first novel. It is painful in a good sort of way.

So I have now finally been able to define my role in the art’s world. It is a very important role without which the art world would simply collapse. I am an audience member. Where are they without us?

Occasionally I rise above my station. This time I became a model for a group of painters. It was quite an experience sitting in the same position for three hours while talented people tried to capture my essence in paint. There was a buzz in the air. The conversations about the strengths and weaknesses of acrylics went on for well over a half hour. The discussion of the first Plein Aire Festival that had just concluded devoured another large chunk of time. Three hours went by in almost no time at all.

Eight or nine renditions of me emerged from the canvasses. All were unique. All were interesting. Here are three samples; one from each side of me and one from the front. The one with me facing right was painted by Jesus Estevez, who has a studio at 395 Front St. The face-on painting was done by Elizabeth Dinkel and is currently on display at Gallery 121, the portrait of me facing right was painted by Chantelle Dinkel. I am not sure where she exhibits, but she can be reached through Dinkel’s, the restaurant. Everyone has a role in the art’s world. Maybe you would enjoy being a model. Send me a text or an e-mail and I can hook you up. No agent fees. 🙂

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